Bangkok, 2014.
The last time I cheated on the SAT by taking it for someone was in 2014. I was in my late 20s, but I still thought I could pass as a high school student if I dressed the part.
That day, I wore a plain polo shirt with a pleated skirt, trying to look like a quiet, innocent student. I skipped makeup because my hotel was a bit far from the test center and didn’t have time that morning and my head was still pounding from all the modafinil I had taken. Besides, I knew most Chinese high school girls don’t wear it.
I thought I looked convincing, just like the dozens of times I had taken the SAT and the ACT before, but I was wrong.
The test center was at an international school in Bangkok, and the entrance was already packed with students and their parents. I saw a well-off Thai father drop off his handsome son and wish him luck for the exam in Thai.
As I walked toward the entrance, holding a sloppily made fake ID and my admission ticket—both bearing a badly photoshopped image that was supposed to be a mix of my face and that of the student I was taking the SAT for—I noticed one of the proctors. He was a middle-aged white man with glasses, and his eyes seemed to follow me. He wasn’t looking at anyone else like that. My stomach tightened, but I kept my head down, gripped my ticket, and kept walking.
When I tried to enter the test center, he stepped in front of me. “Are you a student?” he asked, staring directly at me.
I froze. My heart started pounding, and my mind went blank. For a second, I thought I was caught. But I forced myself to smile and stay calm. “Yes, sir,” I said softly, trying to sound shy and innocent.
He didn’t move right away. He kept staring at me like he was trying to figure something out. My entire body was tense, and it felt like everyone around us was watching. I was sure he would take my fake ID and call someone over. I was ready to run.
But then, after what felt like forever, he gave me a small nod and stepped aside. I walked in quickly, keeping my head down and trying not to show how scared I was. When I finally sat down in the testing room, I let out a long, shaky breath.
Later I found out the hard way that I should have kept my guard up throughout, but that’s a story for another day.
Years later, when I watched the Thai movie Bad Genius (2017), the intense scenes felt like déjà vu.
The test itself went smoothly, and I finished without any issues. But that proctor’s question haunted me:
Are you a student?
I realized that I didn’t look like a schoolgirl anymore. My face and demeanor were no longer enough to fool people into thinking I was a teenager. That day in Bangkok wasn’t just a close call—It was the moment I knew my days of larping as a student taking the SAT and ACT were over.
Oh, I scored a 2380 that day (out of 2400).
— Daisy
